not just any commercial

check out this commercial that andrew (matt's youngest brother) filmed a couple months back... every time i watch it i just have to laugh in amazement! it's so professional!

twin cousins

most of the time they are fighting. if one has a toy, the other wants it. they spend more time playing with each other's toys, than their own. just about all the time, one of them is crying because the other took the toy they were playing with. but this, this was a rare moment of happiness that i must share.

guess what mommy got for christmas??

that's right, i got a new digital camera.
there will be lots of new movies for you to see.
for now, here's some of alaythia playing with her tea set and isaiah coming in the picture with his new raiders uniform, minus the helmet.
merry christmas!

here are some of my favorite pics so far

i'm an auntie you know...and i love it!

michael and hallie...the newlyweds...are isaiah's favorite people right now. mommy, daddy, papa, gg - doesn't matter. michael and hallie trump everyone!

papa and gg had a surprise for us tonight...a limo ride for the 13 of us to go look at christmas lights. it was such a fantastic memory, martinelli's, toasting and carols.

uncle matt and auntie laura were putting the babies to the ceiling and 'hanging' them there. they LOVED it!

this is all the siblings with their significant others...we're used to michael and andrew hugging each other for pictures. now, they each have women of their own!

me and my kiddos in front of the fire and christmas tree. we were on our own for the first few days, but daddy is here now and we're so glad!

gg and her girl.

isaiah and his auntie.

it's time to come clean

i've obviously not been as faithful to this as i have been in the past. and don't think it don't know it. it weighs on me. but if i'm honest i'm a bit scared...a bit like deer caught in headlights. i'm unable to do it.

here's why. it feels like over the past few months there has been this crescendo of interest in the blog. strangers, people that i barely know, people i know well, all saying they read faithfully. some say i should write a book. some talk about this story or that story. 'that was so creative!' 'how did you think of that?'

the other day i got a phone call from someone (who shall remain unnamed) and the first words out of their mouth were, 'you need to post! stop doing what your doing and put something cute and creative on there!' now i know they were joking, but it really did freak me out.

i never set out to be funny, or creative, or a writer. because i am none of those things. it's a fluke if any of those things happened. so now i'm paralyzed. afraid to be caught, afraid the truth will come out. so i shy away.

the reality is i live a very ordinary life, although with extra-ordinary people. and i never want this blog to become something that is mustered up, trying to 'be' something. i just wanted it to be my life. i haven't felt it would be authentic in this past month, so i shied away. i fight my own dragons. it's not because of comments, it's me. and i'm trying to overcome.

but i do feel it rising up in me again. a desire to share, thoughts to tell you about. unhindered by the thought that i must be anything else but myself.

not like everything else

the church that we became members of last week, (yes it's official) put out an advent CD this year. if you want something new you can check it out here. this is a breath of fresh air for me. we sang some of them in church today. all i have to say is 'what child is this'. amazing.

also, there's even a way to download it for free...it's pretty self explanatory, so i'll let you explore how to do it.

just in case you don't believe me

this may look like an ordinary piece of luggage to you. nice shape, svelte black color and nice straps to hold other pieces of luggage...no, it's much more.

one morning isaiah came running out to the kitchen and said, 'mom! you have GOT to come see where your daughter is hiding!' yes, this is one of his favorite ways to refer to alaythia or anyone really. i have to see 'what my husband' did, or 'my father' or 'my brother'.

so i follow him into our bedroom and begin my search. it's quiet and still. i listen for 'my daughter' and hear nothing...silence. aahh, a sweet sound -- and yet before i'm able to fully take in the moment -- i'm overcome with alaythia's ability to remain so still and quiet.

i look in all the usual spots and when all other options are exhausted, i walk over to our walk in closet, (that serves as storage). i see nothing, only the recently unloaded luggage sitting at the front.

and then, she pops out and growls.


i'm thrilled. exuberant. proud. laughing and clapping.

she's amazing!

(i didn't take the picture right then, i made her go back in while i grabbed the camera. she was all to happy to oblige.)

there's something about this place

i swear the things that have happened to me since being in kentucky...well i should write a book. well, it's not enough for a book so i'll write a blog.

i am a competent, organized, administrative woman. i'm not super woman or mom by any stretch of the means, but i can get things done. and usually get them done efficiently. but something about this place...crazy things keep happening to me and to the things around me.

like my refrigerator door just falling completely off the hinges one morning, going to costco and my debit card strangely not working while i wait to pay for hundreds of dollars of goods. (it never did work and i left crying. and yes there was money in the bank!) or picking up prescriptions for the family, and having isaiah's bottle fall out of the little drive thru dispenser. i couldn't open my door because of the cement bars, so i pulled forward only to realize that i had run over his entire bottle of medicine. or pulling out into the street only to find that my only two choices were to run over the cement median or drive into oncoming traffic.

i really did believe that i was capable, but the happenings of the past few months (and days) are leaving me with the sneaking suspicion that i might not be as put together as i thought i was.

a lame attempt at catch up

this should probably be 14 different posts...but i'm behind, and there are way to many things rolling around in my head! i must get rid of them.

funny sayings:
-isaiah said totally sincerely to alaythia right after she got dressed in a fancy puffy sleeved shirt... 'alaythia, you look as beautiful as a football player!'
-isaiah's best bud sammy came over one afternoon to play. they spent most of their time screaming and running through the house. but isaiah wanted to play duck-duck-goose. sam was insistant that he wanted to be the first 'ducker', but isaiah also was sure he wanted to. so isaiah just went for it. when he got to sam he patted him on the head and said, 'duck'. sam immediately responded while shaking his fists, 'i am not a duck! i am a man!'

things i realized anew:
-airports are not made for children, although i see a lot of them around and in them. and i wonder...why are they ignored?
-i tend to romanticize things in my head. i had built up the northwest so much since i'd been gone. it is a wonderful place, full of people that i love...but i am good at expanding the truth.
-it was good to be home and be with family and friends. but it was also good to be home to realize that's not where we belong. that last year in the northwest we spent so much time waiting to hear from schools...so much time not moving forward. but in kentucky, as hard as it's been, we are moving forward. in fact, as of today, we're done with our first semester!
-i am so proud of matthew and the path he's on. i love what he's doing with his life, that he had a dream and is going for it. i love that we have a clear idea of what we're supposed to be about...and we're doing it.
-i live far, far away from just about everyone i know...even flying on a plane, it takes me ALL DAY to get either to them, or home.

p.s. i promise i'll be better at this...sorry for the hiatus.