losing it

he walked out a couple nights ago, finger in mouth, wiggling a tooth back and forth. i couldn't speak. i couldn't believe it.

i was ready for him to turn 5. i had time to process, to get acclimated to it. but not losing teeth! this came as a total surprise and shock. my little boy was losing his baby-ness...his baby teeth.

a few days later, matt and i sat through dinner in suspense, afraid he would swallow his tooth. when teeth brushing arrived, a small tug from mommy popped it right out.

he said he was hoping for $20 under his pillow, so he could get a new transformer. not in this house!

my boy grows up and matt states it's going to fast, we've got to slow it down.

happy birthday alaythia!

you are three today. you are my beautiful, strong, confident first born daughter. i love your crazy hair and your crazy talk. i love that you know what you want.


i love to tickle you and snuggle with you (you're the best snuggler). i love to sing with you and scare people with you.


i love that you do whatever it is that you want. i know sometimes you get in trouble for that...for doing things you shouldn't. but i love that you don't care what others think. i love that you are unaffected by people around you.

you are truth and grace all bottled up into one. you are living up to your name.


you push me alaythia. to be a better mommy, to be a better follower of Jesus. to never stop learning how to love you.

you amaze me still, three years after i saw your face for the first time. i often catch myself just staring at you...amazed that you are mine.


my heart is full because of the gift you are to me. to our entire family.

6 months

there have been so many new things for sophia this month. these are my favorite months, because they are not totally mobile yet, but their personality starts to show through.


sophia does a great job of communicating when she wants me. there's a certain tone to her scream. there is no doubt when she wants me.

she's a very serious girl. a studier of life, and there is always a lot of life going on around her! while it is easy to make her smile, she saves her laughs.


she continues to love new faces and new situations. she gets really serious and just observes for a while. once she gets acclimated then she livens up again.


she has started to roll over and grab toys. but her favorite thing to grab is hair. while she sucks her thumb to go to sleep she'll take her other hand and stroke the same patch of hair on the top of her head. yes, it is a bit thinner in that part. if she's going to sleep on me, she'll grab my hair and twirl it around. she even likes to eat hair. i know, gross. but when i'm holding her facing me, she'll often grab my hair and slobber all over it. i'm often seen walking around with a patch of wet slobber hair.


she continues to be a source of tremendous joy in our lives. i know most parents say that about their kids, but in our lives right now, she really does provide pure joy. her smile, her personality, her little hands and her wet kisses....i wish you all could come over and spend a few minutes with her, she would capture your heart immediately. what a blessed life we have with our sweet, sweet sophia!

Say What?! Wednesday

yesterday when isaiah was talking with his grandpa, his grandpa asked him how it felt to be five. isaiah matter-of-factly said, 'well, it feels like i was four yesterday.'

birthday party

we did another combined birthday party this year. and being that we're in the middle of winter here and the kids are getting older and bigger, we decided to rent a bounce warehouse for their party. we got to invite a certain number of friends to come bounce and celebrate with us.

it's also a perfect opportunity to let you 'get to know' who our friends are! lots of pictures to come....

here are the birthday kids, ready to go!

our neighbor collins...gotta love that hair.

rachel and caroline. this is collins' mommy and sister.

ryne was one of the first down the slide.
isaiah was most excited about being 5 because he would be 'just like ryne'.
i didn't have the heart to tell him ryne turned 6 a couple weeks ago...

alaythia did this about 30 times.

august on his way down.

isaiah and jakob - they are two peas in a pod.

randi and alexis (with jonathon strapped in). when the mommies didn't have babies strapped on, we did get in the bounce houses.

matt took some time to launch the kids off the center 'mushroom'.

basil (with elijah in the background). elise gets 'mommy of the year' award because she played on the bounce houses THE ENTIRE time with basil.

the three PhD students (matt, andy and robb). i begged them to let me take this picture and told them one day when they're all famous (and go by matthew, andrew and robert) i'll whip it back out.

alaythia and her friend alethia!

the big 5 year old, sweaty and happy.

this is natalie...every time i went to take a picture she made a face at me. love that girl!

all the kiddos heading up the big slide.

oliver and merry.

me and soph with sarah and emma. emma is just 3 weeks older than sophia. it has been so nice to have a friend to walk the #3 road with.(her oldest is jakob pictured above and august is her middle).

time for cake and ice cream, but more importantly -- juice!

alaythia was SO HAPPY when everyone was singing to her.
she glowed next to her belle princess cake.

isaiah told me before the party he was going to get embarrassed when people sang to him, so when it was his turn he turned his back to everyone and looked at his sword and shield cake while we sang.

we had such a great time. the kids were so tired (mommy and daddy too) and happy afterward. a great day of celebrating!

happy birthday isaiah

five years old. i'm not sure how that can be. done with little-boyhood. moving up to school age. time is going fast.

i love to spend my days with you isaiah. as you haveg otten older i love our conversations more and more. about new things your thinking about, about new ideas and adventures. you soak everything up. your mind is astonishing and it seems you can't get enough information to fill it.

you've mastered dinosaurs - names, types, characteristics. you've struggled to understand the world of transformers, that you love so much. fake, yet oh-so-important to you right now. your understanding of Jesus is deepening. listening to you articulate who Jesus is and what He's done for you...it's often times presented so eloquently and fully that i can't contain myself.

you are a joy to your dad and me isaiah, a true blessing. we couldn't love you more!

pass it on

we were in the car the other day, all 5 of us when alaythia turned to isaiah and said, 'isaiah, how did Jesus die?' isaiah proceeded to tell her that he was arrested by soldiers, was hit and spit on and put on a cross and crucified. 'spit?' she questioned. he assured her he was spit on. she spit as in disbelief, thinking surely she had heard wrong and they weren't understanding each other. but isaiah nodded his head.

now with the way things have been going in our house lately, someone is the 'protector' and someone is the one in trouble. so it was no surprise when she said, 'so he fought the soldiers?' isaiah said, 'actually alaythia he didn't fight back.' 'what!?' she proclaimed. 'yep, he didn't fight back.' she immediately said, 'i'll protect Jesus!' isaiah did his best to explain to her that Jesus let them kill him. that he was willing to die for us.

alaythia sat there for a few seconds trying to get it and then turned to sophia, sitting on the other side of her and said, 'sophia Jesus loves you! he loves you so much!'

matt and i, sitting in the front seat could not believe our ears. to hear our children communicating the gospel to each other...i am sure there is nothing greater in the world. as the conversation started, progressed and ended, matt and i continued to make huge eyes at each other in astonishment.

so often it seems i get so overwhelmed with all i'm failing at as a mother. but this has reminded me that while i play a big part in my kids lives, i'm not the end all, i don't carry the burden alone. the LORD will draw them and move them through many different people in their lives. they will hear the truth of who God is from many. even from each other. once again, i need to stop thinking the world begins and ends with me. God is the one that is faithful, God is the one that does the work.



p.s. i recently read an article titled, 'The Myth of the Perfect Parent: Why the best parenting techniques don't produce Christian children'. It's worth a read.

unbelievable

i bought the bowls. i bought the spoons, cups and lids. i bought the food. and still, when the first swallow went down tonight...i cried. today sophia had her first 'real people food' as the kids say. she was ready, i was not. it's the whole 'last time' thing.

it's been a heck of a day though. if she makes it to her first birthday it will be a miracle. i thought i better get this down because i'll forget...and i want alaythia and sophia to be able to know what their lives looked like. today, it was unbelievable alaythia.

today alone alaythia:

brushed sophia's head with her toothbrush. we were hustling out the door and i asked alaythia to go put her toothbrush back in the bathroom. as i finished getting dressed and walked around the corner i found the girls. sophia's hair matted down with slobber and remains of toothpaste, the electric toothbrush massaging her head.

gave sophia her first taste of juice. sophia was laying on the bed while i put away some clothes. alaythia climbed up to play. i turned my back, hung a shirt and when i turned around i found alaythia dumping her sippy cup of cherry juicy juice into sophia's mouth. sophia smacking away.

gave sophia her underwear to chew on. i was washing dishes and sophia was in her excersaucer. alaythia said she had to go potty, so i walked her into the bathroom, turned on the light, got her situated and went back to washing the dishes. she came out silently from the bathroom and when i turned around to check on the silent sophia, found alaythia in the buff and sophia sucking on white 'my little pony' underwear.

to top the day off, she just about sent me into hysterics at the grocery store. we had a talk before we went in, we were going to work together, be a team, this was mommy's first time doing major grocery shopping alone with all three kids. so the older ones climb into the cart and i walk to the front of the cart to drop the diaper bag in. when i turn around i find alaythia...get ready...sucking on the cart handle! i am telling you, it was all i could do to not scream in frustration and throw up in disgust. i still shiver from top to bottom when i think about it.

time to put this crazy day to rest.

Say What?! Wednesday

it's like a competition between isaiah and alaythia. who can make sophia smile the most, laugh the hardest or entertain her the best.

but often times it becomes a fight. pushing each other out from in front of her, fighting about whose turn it is.

one day in the midst of the fighting alaythia yelled, 'no isaiah! it's my turn to use her!'

snowed in

we are having quite the winter. nothing like last winter with ice storms and lost power. but today is our fourth snow day in the past week. it's beautiful and we have learned how to function inside everyday, with an occasional burst of outside time. i am coming to love the simplicity of it.

snow day or not, there really is no rest for a PhD student, just trying to study at home instead of the library. or like yesterday - when most people were off of work, and what schools were opened decided to close - you have class in your professor's office.

lots of coloring, forts, movies and comfort food...we've been overwhelmingly thankful for our abundance. for good friends to go play in the snow with, for a warm house to come home to, for jackets and mittens and beanies.

but it feels a little like the calm before the storm. it's a big week in the godshall home next week. we have one turning 5 on tuesday, one turning 6 months on thursday and one turning 3 on friday. here we go!

back by popular demand

well, that may be an overstatement...'popular demand'. but it was a request, and recently i began (again) saving those nuggets of crazy speech that come out of my kids.

say what?! wednesday

i hate to admit it. i swore that it would never be this way. but unfortunately, mommy and daddy's room is the last room in the house to get clean. and the way life is right now, that means it pretty much never is clean. keeping up with the rest of the house keeps me plenty busy.

well i had enough one day and decided if nothing else got done that day - that would be fine - as long as our room was clean at the end of it. it happened, and as i was at the last step vacuuming the room, alaythia ran in, stopped in her tracks and proclaimed,

'mom! you're a genius! you cleaned your room. good job mom.'

8 inches

we had to get out and play. isaiah and alaythia decided to climb the hill.

mommy had to get some pictures of our backyard.

alone

when i was in high school i remember sitting in a movie theater with friends and watching this woman walk in alone. she sat down in the row in front of us just slightly to the right. i was so embarrassed for her. i remember thinking it would be better to not go to a movie than see one alone. at the time, that equaled serious humiliation.

once i was in college and early married, my embarrassment for people turned into compassion. i just plain felt bad for them. sad that they didn't have someone to watch with, sad that they were alone.

today, one of my favorite things to do is go to a movie alone. i love it because it's so opposite of the reality of my everyday life. there is no one to monitor. no one to talk to. i am responsible for nothing. no interruptions. i go and get lost for a few hours. i don't have to worry about it being too loud or too scary or too much skin.

now, don't get me wrong, i like going to movies with my husband. but at this time in our lives, it doesn't make sense. first the whole babysitter thing. but let's just say we did get a babysitter, the last thing i would want to do is go sit in a dark theater and not talk to him while we had time to ourselves. time to be able to finish a sentence - a thought - without getting interrupted.

i wonder if the young girls in the theater feel bad for me when they see me walk in a sit down alone. they have no idea it's a sweet reprieve - it's just the way i like it.

p.s. mom is doing better - if you want to see pictures of the time over there you can click here.

a look

itiswhatitis...a look at what is going on in cambodia.

they saw over 100 people the first day of the clinic. the last 5 patients of the day (thursday) she started to feel hot. she's at the hotel sick with chills/fever and home from the clinic (friday).

growth

i remember when isaiah was newborn it was a major accomplishment when i got my teeth brushed before matt got home from work. i remember having to use the restroom and holding it almost all day until i had the opportunity to go...by myself.

while the days of privately using the restroom are long gone, i've been thinking about those early days and wondering how in the world that was true of my life. why didn't i just carry him along with me...like i do with my third now?

as i was brushing my teeth the other day, baby in arms, i was pondering all the different things i do now with arms quite full.....

-put away clean dishes
-load dirty dishes
-switch laundry
-wipe other people's bottoms
-vacuum
-email
-scrub a toilet (this was a first for me a couple days ago...)
-talk on the phone
-brush my hair
-pick up toys
-put other people to sleep

and that's just off the top of my head.

i am in no way discounting those who have one child and have a hard time keeping up. it's normal and it is hard. i guess it's a learning curve. i'm not saying i have it figure out...but i guess just observing how i've grown. grown into this life - as everyone does.

not sure if you saw this

but my mom posted a comment on the previous post. i thought i would copy it so that you could see it...

i am well and sitting in the hotel lobby rested and ready to head out for the day..i think we all have adjusted to being ahead a day. heading to a clinic to orient this am and then see the holocaust museum/prison this afternoon. meeting with other agencies here. feels like a convergence of sorts. thanks to all of you for sending me out with such great strength. i feel your prayers and support.
love donna