dozer day 2008

this pretty much explains it all. we have been living in winter weather since october and the weekend of dozer day it decided to be 95 degrees. daddy was working, so mommy brought a friend and we braved the heat.

this was sister's throne. not walking yet, and mommy not wanting her to crawl through dirt - here she sat the entire time. which actually wasn't too long because we all got WAY to hot and weren't going to wait in the hour lines to drive big machines.

but we got there right when the gates opened and we got a good 3 rides in with no lines. this year they didn't have to sit on the driver's laps. they actually got to drive in the seat on their own.

the highlight?? i don't have pictures of it. but isaiah and mommy got to drive an excavator all by ourselves! it wasn't anything different for isaiah...but the first time mommy got to drive one. i'll admit, i was giddy!

i love this moment

i had just finished putting on a shower and was totally pooped. i put on a movie for the kids to watch so i could catch some rest. at one point i looked over at alaythia...she was so intent on watching. she was still and mesmerized.

i couldn't help but stare in wonder. who is this girl standing before me? who will she be? do i really know her?

and how cute she is...loving her belly button, so big standing there by herself, her little dandelion hair. i stared for awhile before i decided to try to capture the moment with the camera.

all done. i had been caught. but i was glad i had something to help me remember how i was feeling at that moment.

as if we weren't enough reason

here are some things that go on in louisville to entice you to come and visit.

obviously the kentucky derby...the first saturday in may. along with two weeks of events that surround it. the 'thunder over louisville' the largest annual fireworks display in the nation. the festival also has events like the pegasus parade, the great steamboat race, great balloon race, a marathon, and about seventy events in total.

on memorial day weekend there is the largest annual beetles festival in the world. the festival lasts five days and is located on the belvedere in downtown Louisville.

in the summer there is the kentucky shakespeare festival. free shakespeare plays in central park.

in september there is a hot air balloon festival. there are early morning balloon races, and balloon glows in the evening.

and don't forget the kentucky bourbon festival, come get some of the finest bourbon in the world.

i need that boy

there are days when trusting the Lord is exhilarating. the unknown seems like an adventure. your faith is being stretched like a rubber band. you're reaching your limit, but you know you're going to be catapulted through the air very soon. then there are days when it's not so great. you're overwhelmed, afraid, tired of being in limbo and frankly, freaked out of your mind that everything in life is uncertain. today is one of those days. one of those days when you doubt everything...what you're doing, how you're doing it and that it will ever work out. when you're paralyzed by fear, sure that you don't have what it takes.

we had just gotten back from an outing. we pulled into the garage and before i could stop the car isaiah said, 'mom, let's listen to this song.' i obliged. i got alaythia out of her car seat and put her on my lap. we listened, sang and played. all of the sudden isaiah says from the back seat. 'we don't have to be afraid.' i whipped my head around and looked at him, searching his face, trying to figure out why he said that.

'what?!'
'we don't have to be afraid.'
i paused for a long time, our eyes locked.
'why don't we have to afraid?' i asked.
'because of Jesus....because we have Jesus.'
i nodded in approval.

i turned my head quickly and then disintegrated. sobbing into the back of alaythia's head at the profound truth that just came out of my son's mouth. letting the truth that he spoke sink deep into my heart. crying at God's goodness, his faithfulness, using even my 3 year old son to bring comfort and truth.

my son had no idea how much his mommy needed to hear what he had to say. there was no context for it. life may be uncertain, but what i do know is i need that boy. and i need the Lord. and together, we'll do it.

it will never end will it?

i woke this morning with renewed energy. if i told you of the happenings over the weekend in the 90+ weather, i'm sure you wouldn't believe me. but the air was crisp this morning, and i knew that today isaiah had an appointment to get his cast off.

the blazing heat and you can't get wet, dirty...playing outside makes you hot and sticky and stinky. to his credit, he never complained. but every once in a while i would get a whiff of something and wonder. was it dozer day....was it the birthday party where he spent most of the time digging in the dirt...was it when he spent the evening, until 9pm working in the backyard with grandpa? well, it didn't matter. today it would come off and we would be clean. no more dirt that we can't reach, no more limping and banging against the hard wood when we walked.

ahh. yes, it was a new day.

we had averted disaster. no major hysterics and i think he became accustomed to the attention. alaythia began calling for me. isaiah and matt were still sound asleep. so i rushed in, grabbed her, a clean diaper, wipes and headed downstairs. all would be right again. all would be back to normal.

what is normal anyway?

in the quiet of the morning, just us girls awake, i grabbed alaythia's cheeks and went to kiss her 'good morning.' but then, i saw it...her non-surgery eye...goopy, red, puffy.

no no no no no no no no .......

yes.

the cast has come off taking it's germs with it. without as much as a peep i might add. but we have a new friend in town. the pink eye has come and invaded the house.

proof

okay, so today instead of freaking out, i grabbed the camera. in my defense there were 2 other adults in the room that i thought were 'taking charge' of her while i did the dishes...
yes, she took her sunglasses up there with her. what is that all about?
she's sitting in rice a roni that she spooned out of the serving bowl BEFORE climbing up.
and she's picking apart - pedal by pedal - a dandelion that isaiah picked for me tonight.

limp & drag -- swallowing hysterics

so first off, i have to 'blag' about my son. (using a blog to brag...which some might argue is what this site really is). i expected drama from this cast. i envisioned screaming, crying, uncontrolled itching. but none of that has come about. its as if he doesn't have plaster on his leg. it's as if he was always meant to have this on. in fact the biggest side effect has not been to him at all.

as alaythia loves her brother and seeks to emulate EVERYTHING he does, it's come to our attention that in her attempt to learn to walk, she has assumed that walking with a limp and 'dragging' a foot behind you is what you do. as we were walking out of church on sunday we all witnessed her 'limp and drag'. while there was urge to laugh hysterically...the mother in me realizes how important it is to learn to walk and i swallowed my hysterics. it will remain to be seen how this affects her long term.

since we're on the topic of my sweet, loving little daughter -- she's really coming into her own of late. reminding us daily that, yes, she is a girl. yesterday bursting into tears, only desiring to be held. or crying a little extra just to get some more kisses. but to our surprise she is following in her uncle michael's footsteps and in the last few days has become a climber. i'll find her on the toy chest crying, wanting to get down but unsure how to do it. the little desk in the playroom -- her new throne. i'll walk around the corner to find her perched there. but this morning was the kicker.

to get us all out the door for preschool this morning i turned on some cartoons and left the kids downstairs to get dressed. when i came back down less than 5 minutes later i realized i was no longer going to be able to do this. the t.v. had become unattractive to alaythia. i found her sitting on the kitchen table, pulling all of the tokens out of the sequence game. she had her sunglasses on -- upside down. she was eating some tokens and throwing others. it looked hysterical, but knowing how unsafe it was again, i swallowed.

it's not as serious as it seems...i think

so now i'll fill you in on the comment about isaiah's foot. last thursday was a sunny day and isaiah wanted to go help the neighbor do some yard work. i noticed that afternoon that he was limping. strange for isaiah. i asked him if his foot hurt and he said no. friday continued the limping, with a trip to the park with grandma and grandpa. he was running, playing, jumping off play structures. all the time limping, but not complaining.

those of you who know isaiah well, know that he LOVES owies. he loves to show them off and baby them. so it seemed very strange to us that he would be limping so badly, but not saying anything about it. saturday we went for a long walk and i had him either be in the stroller or be carried. sunday we had a birthday party in the park. the limping got so bad on sunday i figured i should take him in. but it was sunday, so our only choice was to go to the ER.

3 and half hours later, xrays and medicine, they determined there was no fracture. and sent us home saying 'lower leg bruise.' really...seems vague enough to be right. if he wasn't better by tuesday they told me to call his primary doctor. on tuesday when he resorted to crawling at times, i thought, okay he's going in.

on the infamous '21' day, he saw his pediatrician who sent him again for xrays. no fracture showed, but she didn't know what it was, so she referred us to an orthopedist. at 9:00 this morning we were at the office to be seen.

he agrees there is no fracture. but isaiah is obviously bothered. he babies it and won't put pressure on it anymore. the doctor then proceeds to tell me that to be safe, because with children you always want to error on the safe side, he wants to put him in a cast for 10-14 days.

i'm sure he could see the shock on my face. 'what?' i say. 'there is no fracture that you can see and you think it's best to put a cast on?' all that is running through my head is sleepless nights, how am i going to bathe this child? oh the drama that awaits me.

he then slows down and speaks to me like i'm a 3rd grader and explains that it is the safest thing, we don't mess around with kids who are still growing, and that it will be no big deal. easy for him to say.

he tells isaiah he's going to be casted...isaiah has NO IDEA what that means. still a little stunned and quite a bit urked to be honest, i turn on my it's-gonna-be-great mommy attitude. i do my best to try to explain what a cast is and assure him that daddy will be very jealous not to have one.

isaiah picks neon green and wows the men that cast people all day. so far, he's thrilled that he has a cast, because he's been told it's a wonderful thing. bless his little heart he's having to figure out how to climb stairs, get up on a chair. i'm so proud of how brave he's been, and so far, what a great sport he's been.

just in case you don't believe me, i still hardly believe it myself, here's a picture.

when the sun is out...get out!

we went to the zoo on monday since it was sunny and our day off. it was the first time alaythia had been. it was great to watch her face as she looked at all the animals.

while we were glad we did it...it's making us rethink disneyland this summer.

pictures of our time are here.

marimba

we went over to some friend's house last week. he is a music professor and had brought home a marimba. they invited us over so that isaiah could play. it was a great night of exploring the instrument and playing in different bands.

here is isaiah taking his turn.

soon isaiah had a band going. daddy is on the hammer dulcimer, ben on the guitar and isaiah on the marimba. you can't see it, but the girls were the back up singers.

sister had to get her turn after a while. she had a blast playing too!

lucky number 21

man i've had the day. i talked to my sister in law, laura, half way through the event. all we could do was laugh.

for my last post being about not making progress...well i shot that to pieces today.

as i sat at dinner, delirious, i counted literally, how many times i got the kids in and out of the car.

in -- counts for one.
out -- counts for one.

are you ready? i got the kids in and out of the car 21 times today. no joke.

--but alaythia has a clean bill of health at her post op.
--isaiah doesn't have a broken foot. (yes, i know, you didn't even know i thought he had one). but 2 sets of xrays later we're sure of it.
--we went out to lunch.
--frantically searched through the restaurant for happy feet as he freaked out that he thought he had lost him.
--shopped and mailed for mother's day.
--oh yeah, and crunched my stroller as i forgot it was behind my van and backed OVER it. good thing my kids weren't in it!

late night musings

it's late. i should be in bed. maybe it was all the diet coke i drank. maybe that coffee wasn't decaf after all.

i'm sitting in the living room, listening to the hum of the dishwasher...in the pitch dark. the light of the computer is on the verge of blinding my eyes. everyone is asleep, for now.

conversations that i need to have, conversations that i shouldn't have had, all rolling around in my head. i can't put my mind to rest. so complicated...so unable to make sense or fix it all, or any of it for that matter.

i need to make progress, but i just seem to be running in circles. keeping my head above water, and making due...but not making progress. tomorrow will probably be the same.

i'm sure i'll wake up in the morning and think about this post and wonder why i decided to type out my jumbled thoughts to the masses.

progress, for now.