Friday, March 13, 2009

confessions of...

a lying, manipulating, control freak.

i owe a public apology (only because i have already apologized personally to those i need to) for not keeping to my word. as stated at the end of a post on surprises, i called a truce and said i would respect the other person trying to surprise me and would stop investigation.

but as most addicts, or control freaks, i relapsed...later that day mind you. i didn't even have the balls to wait a day.

without going into details i will say - my poor husband. i lied, i manipulated, i lied some more. and before he knew what hit him i knew everything.

the thing is, for the first time, it was not fun. maybe because i had to do so many 'wrong' things to find out. maybe because once i found out i wished, for my dear friend, that she could have surprised me. and in retelling the story, i realize how really awful i was. it wasn't funny and as someone said to me today, something is wrong with me.

so i'm letting everyone know, publicly, that i didn't do what i said i would do.

but i am excited about what it is!

4 comments:

Christi said...

You are so awesome...you said "balls" in this post - one more reason to love you.

Rebecca Slater said...

oh dearest natalie, just wait and see what torture i am going to put you through when i do get there to see you!!....(forgive me an evil laugh....brwaaahahahah!!!)
but, when its all said and done, i can't blame you for getting the info...so if i was honest with myself, i may have just done the same thing..but i would have just taken the easy route....gotten those with vital information sloppy drunk and then pounced on their vulnerable states. you can use that move for next time. oh wait, there isnt going to be a next time, IS THERE!?!?!?!
ps better start looking for that tattoo design you've always wanted....

Rebecca Slater said...

i forgot to say that i love you no matter what and i am so excited to see you in a few weeks!!

Anonymous said...

yes , yes tattoo time, do it do it!